Seven Myths Young Women Believe
1. God will give me a husband when I'm ready.
2. God views me more as a useful tool than a beloved child.
3. When its the right guy, Ill just know.
4. When I get married, then my life will begin.
5. Marriage will/will not meet my deepest needs.
6. There must be something wrong with me. If I could just figure out what it is, I could fix it & guys will just start showing interest.
7. The older I get, the less likely I will find someone.
* What other things can you add to this list?
* Would you agree with this list?
* Would you agree with this list?
1. What incorrect perspectives on relationships, singleness & marriage do you think Christian single guys hold?
2. Are they the same as the ones women believe or different?
Very, very interesting! I don't know that much about guys, but one thing I heard once was that guys think that if they aren't attractive (meaning that they perceive themselves as unattractive) no woman is going to want them.
ReplyDeleteYes! I think so too. Girls too, except they compare themselves to others other girls. It's the persons relationship with The Lord that counts, their heart. We must trust Christ for everything, our confidence in Him will ease those doubts.
DeleteGood thoughts!
ReplyDelete2. God views me more as a useful tool than a beloved child.
No, I think He views us as His beloved Child, someone He love dearly. He wants the best for us, whether we are married or single, and will provide for us in either situation. On the flip side, we should hope He can use us as useful tools in His kingdom
3. When its the right guy, I'll just know.
Maybe, I haven't experienced this, so I don't have personal experience, but I do think God may "open our eyes" to view someone was "the one" if they are the right one for us. We will probably know because we think of them differently then any other person we ever met or have known.
4. When I get married, then my life will begin.
Not a good way to think, especially if you would remain single. If you have that mindset, you'll never live life to it's fullest. Prepare for marriage, but live in the here and now, just in case it never happens ;)
6. There must be something wrong with me. If I could just figure out what it is, I could fix it & guys will just start showing interest.
No, we need to just be ourselves! Now if it's a character issue, then it would be good to change, but not because you think it will net you a catch. We need to be ourselves, be accountable to God, and He will bring us a guy who loves us for who we are. Again, if you are lacking in a spiritual trait or character quality, like patience, or servanthood, it won't hurt to to work on it. But if you are living for Christ and under His guidance, you shouldn't have to change just so guys notice or like you more. Remember, you only need one guy, not hoards! =D
7. The older I get, the less likely I will find someone.
A lot of people are older when they're married. It may seem like it is harder, but I don't think it necessarily is. There are lots of older single people out there, and sometimes, the older they are, the more mature they tend to be.
* What other things can you add to this list?
Another possible myth could be "If I do this, this and this ( whatever that may be),
I'm guaranteed marriage". A lot of books promote staying home, living under your parents guidance, etc. and while these are good, I think some girls may think if they follow these things perfectly they are guaranteed marriage, which isn't necessarily the case. What about the girls who do not have Christian parents, or a home, etc.? Does that mean they aren't guaranteed just as godly a marriage as the other girls?
Great thoughts, Samantha! I like the added:
ReplyDelete"Another possible myth could be "If I do this, this and this ( whatever that may be),
I'm guaranteed marriage". A lot of books promote staying home, living under your parents guidance, etc. and while these are good, I think some girls may think if they follow these things perfectly they are guaranteed marriage, which isn't necessarily the case. What about the girls who do not have Christian parents, or a home, etc.? Does that mean they aren't guaranteed just as godly a marriage as the other girls?"
Isnt that the truth though? Some how home schoolers have fallen into this trap, this way of thinking. Everything is from the Lord. period. What you speak of is almost like a "works" system. A follow a book by the law sort of bargain. Instead, we need to follow the Almighty, He alone has the answers, He alone orchestrates. We can know for sure & bank on Christ only, all from Him is a gift, a blessing. If He chooses marriage for anyone, it is because He is sovereign, nothing we have done. We can follow any system we like, but really it is all up to Him. Some how we have lost sight of that. Well... its the fallen world we live in...
You are so very right!
Ouch! This post is too true to be funny! I would agree that those are all very good myths that young ladies believe. (add in the one Samantha said- that was very good!) I think the most believed would be #1 and #6. We think there is something wrong with us, or we aren't "ready" yet. To a degree I believe that could be true, but not in a bad sense. There are certain areas of life that God knows we need to grow in before we would be prepared for marriage. Again, not in a bad way, but in a good way.
ReplyDeleteIs there the "perfect" person out there? I don't know. I go back and forth on that one a lot!! (I love the quote you have at the top!)
I would love to hear some of the married women chiming in on this one. Do they believe there is a "perfect" match out there? Or do you grow together and BECOME a perfect match?
How can 2 sinful human beings become the "perfect" match? ALL relationships have struggles (or they should!) if they are growing in any way. Relationships are hard and that is what makes them so beautiful. :)
Thanks for this post. I have really enjoyed the discussions and reading what others think! Thanks for a place to do that. :D
I have heard many married people (including my parents) say from their experience that "you will just know when it's the right one". This is the only one on the list I'm not sure about, I tend to think it is not a myth because I believe God by the Holy Spirit will let us know when it's the right person (may not be with absolute clarity but He will let us know).
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ReplyDeleteInteresting post. I think the one I find myself believing from time to time is when I get married my life will begin. In away you are starting a new life,but a new life with somone else its just another chapter in your life. I intend to end my 'single' chapter with a bang for Christ instead of being a Princess R from 'tangled' and waiting for my life to begin. Have you ever heard "untangling tangled"? I want to hear it so bad cause if you watch Tangled there are so many lies for girls to believe it breaks my heart.
Also the you'll just know the one whos 'the one' is one I struggle with a little like Joshua David I don't know if that is an actual lie or not I think it might depend on the person,some people met someone and they said they just knew that was the one,others questioned up until they were married,but after they were married they didn't have any more questions and felt they married the right one for them and could't believe they questioned it earlier. So yeah,I think when a guy purposes to me and the thought of spending your entire life with him and raising a family with him excites me I know for sure he is the one. Anyone have thoughts on my last remark?!
Good thoughts, Blythe. hmmmm... "youll just know" I think it happens! I really do :)
DeleteOooh, Blythe - I'm glad I'm not the only one that saw things in Tangled that disturbed me, lol! Sure, the music was pretty, and there were some cute scenes, but there was a lot of disrespect for those in authority, rebellion, etc. I've never heard someone talk "against" those issue in it, I'm glad you saw them,too. Sometimes I wonder if I look into things too much, or make too big of an issue out of things that "seem" small, especially if no one else ever says what they saw wrong it.
ReplyDeleteSorry, that had NOTHING to do with this topic, lol! =)
Nah, Im with you. I dont like Disney all too much, so Im on your side. I never saw Tangled, but know enough about it..
DeleteAlso, that's one of the reasons we didn't watch a lot of the animated Disney movies when we were little. There are a lot of hidden messages in there that are covered over or made to look good with the pretty/handsome characters, nice music, etc.
ReplyDeleteI can count on one hand probably the ones I did see, and those were pretty good, but some are kind of shocking with the things they promoted, which is sad, because a lot of little girls grew up watching the "classic" Disney movies and just get that wrong thinking in them at a young age, and in a seemingly innocent or harmless way.
Okay, I'm done now. =D
We stopped watching the animated ones for the very reason you speak of. And I agree. My older daughters nanny & get to watch what the children watch, but they know & understand the "hidden agenda" in Disney. So, I get this :)
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