tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3572190928846735458.post431541587016895186..comments2023-03-19T01:21:18.346-07:00Comments on Paper Mache : myths about soul matesPatriziahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06720770012584296442noreply@blogger.comBlogger3125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3572190928846735458.post-57754821446316732592013-11-19T05:59:39.624-08:002013-11-19T05:59:39.624-08:00I agree with Miss Dashwood in that the problem wit...I agree with Miss Dashwood in that the problem with Jack and Sandy's story is not so much their belief in a soul mate but rather their understand of what a soul mate is and what real marriage is. Miss Dashwood made the most critical point that marriage is about not focusing on self but the other person, that is real love! <br />The author of the article makes a good point that comitment is vital to a marriage and the core beliefs of both people must be in agreement or there *will* be problems (not that God can't work this out overtime like He has done). <br />Finding a "soul mate" to me is finding someone that holds the same beliefs and the same overall goes goals in life. These are the 2 most critical things to me but of course there are also the lesser factors like physical attraction (which as a guy is honestly is NOT the first thing causes me to be attracted to a person). I whole heartedly believe that much time getting to know both the person you are attracted to AND his/her <br />family is vital to learning what the other person believes to be important spiritually and in living. The fact is most people whether they want to or not will at least have the same tendencies to live in the same way as their parents/family. <br />There really is a lot to consider when looking for a marriage partner and it should not be rushed when getting to know a person but a person must also have reasonable expectations knowing that we are marrying another imperfect sinner like ourselves.Sir Joshua Davidhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06554091571657063048noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3572190928846735458.post-74385581389659227452013-11-17T19:19:31.759-08:002013-11-17T19:19:31.759-08:00Miss Dashwood, no matter if youve not been in a re...Miss Dashwood, no matter if youve not been in a relationship as of yet, your points are validated & accepted. You have made some very important observations & good ones at that! Thank you so very much for your input, you are very wise. :)Patriziahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06720770012584296442noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3572190928846735458.post-40659511311843123972013-11-17T05:24:18.738-08:002013-11-17T05:24:18.738-08:00I think the problem that the fictional Jack and Sa...I think the problem that the fictional Jack and Sandy had was not necessarily the concept of believing they had a soul mate, but WHAT they believed a soul mate WAS. The root problem in that story-- to my perception, anyway-- was selfishness. What's in this for me, I need someone who will make me secure, I need someone who will love ME unconditionally, I have high expectations for this person who will make ME HAPPY. And that's not what a good marriage ought to be founded on. Love is about giving of yourself and doing your utmost to make the person you LOVE happy, not looking for fulfillment for yourself. Obviously if two people really are soul mates, they'll make each other happy and find happiness for themselves in the process because they really do "click," but the whole mindset of "I must find someone who is my other half because that's what *I* need to complete ME" doesn't quite ring true. And if you really, really loved someone, wouldn't you want to talk through issues like different backgrounds and values before you made a commitment to marriage, to make sure that there wouldn't be big problems later on? Obviously no marriage is absolutely perfect and no one can prevent all trials. But in this story Jack and Sandy were just focused on each other, ended up taking things too fast and not thinking them through, and then, boom, problems later on. I think this was more a result of infatuation without prudence and patience, not the fact that they felt they were soul mates. And just in case I haven't confused people enough with this comment, I'll throw in another paradox-- I'm an incurable romantic and I love the idea of two people meeting and "clicking" and knowing from the beginning that they were meant to be together forever. I just think there should be a little more caution and a lot more putting-the-other-before-yourself thrown into the mix as well. End of long and convoluted and preachy comment from an eighteen-year-old who's never been in a relationship. :P Miss Dashwoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15821653607968651548noreply@blogger.com